Quotes

On this page, you will find all sorts of quotes, you can browse by author or by subject.

Browse by Topic

• Boredom
• Funny Quotes
• Happiness
• Law & Order
• Pregnancy & Kids
• Men, Women & Relationships
• Sports
• War & Peace
• Propaganda
• Nationalism/Patriotism
• History/Politics
• Economics
• Money
• Power
• Slavery/Freedom
• Prayer
• Love
• Science

Funny Quotes

[It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system. -- US Politician Dan Quayle (1947 - )

I stand by all the misstatements that I've made. -- US Politician Dan Quayle (1947 - )

No man can be a patriot on an empty stomach. -- William Cowper Brann (The Iconoclasts, Old Glory, July 4, 1893)

Half this game is 90% mental. -- Yogi Berra

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
-- Comedian George Burns (1896 - 1996)

Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home.
-- Comedian Bill Cosby (1937 - )

George W. Bush ("Bushisms")

"I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully." (Saginaw, Mich., Sept. 29, 2000)

"We'll let our friends be the peacekeepers and the great country called America will be the pacemakers." (Houston,Texas, Sept. 6, 2000)

"It's clearly a budget. It's got a lot of numbers in it." (Reuters, May 5, 2000)

"I was raised in the West. The west of Texas. It's pretty close to California. In more ways than Washington, D.C.,is close to California." (In Los Angeles as quoted by the Los Angeles Times, April 8, 2000)

"I understand small business growth. I was one" (New York Daily News, Feb. 19, 2000)

"The most important job is not to be governor, or first lady in my case." (Pella, Iowa, as quoted by the San Antonio Express-News, Jan. 30, 2000)

Happiness

Happiness depends upon ourselves. -- Aristotle

Happiness is like a sunbeam, which the least shadow intercepts, while adversity is often as the rain of spring. -- Chinese Proverb

A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of. -- Jane Austen (1775 - 1817)

Law & Order

Laws are like sausages. It's better not to see them being made. -- Otto von Bismarck (1815 - 1898)

The illegal we do immediately. The unconstitutional takes a little longer. -- Henry Kissinger (1923 - ), New York Times, Oct. 28, 1973.

You can not stop the spread of an idea by passing a law against it.-- Former US President Harry S. Truman (June 4, 1948)

When the President does it, that means that it is not illegal. -- Former US President Richard Nixon (May 19, 1977)

No man is above the law and no man is below it: nor do we ask any man's permission when we ask him to obey it. -- Former US President Theodore Roosevelt

Laws control the lesser man...Right conduct controls the greater one. -- Chinese Proverb

Our laws make law impossible; our liberties destroy all freedom; our property is organized robbery; our morality an impudent hypocrisy; our wisdom is administered by inexperienced or mal-experienced dupes; our power wielded by cowards and weaklings; and our honour false in all its points. I am an enemy of the existing order for good reasons. -- George Bernard Shaw

Pregnancy & Kids

Childbirth classes neglect to teach one critical skill: How to breathe, count, and swear all at the same time. -Linda Filterman

Have you ever tried getting out of your car through the exhaust pipe? -Murphy Brown

Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside. -Rita Rudner

Men, Women & Relationships

Women are made to be loved, not understood. -- Oscar Wilde

Kindness in women, not their beauteous looks, shall win my love. -- William Shakespeare, The Taming of The Shrew

Married love between man and woman is bigger than oaths guarded by right of nature. -- Aeschylus

The chain of wedlock is so heavy that it takes two to carry it - and sometimes three. -- Alexandre Dumas

Marriage is just legalized prostitution. Any man who says he hasn't paid for sex, has never been married! -- Jessica Wood

Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century. -- Mark Twain

The best friend is likely to acquire the best wife, because a good marriage is based on the talent for friendship. -- Friedrich Nietzsche

There is nothing nobler or more admirable than when two people who see eye to eye keep house as man and wife, confounding their enemies and delighting their friends. -- Homer

Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards. -- Benjamin Franklin

It's not beauty but fine qualities, my girl, that keep a husband. -- Euripides

When men and women are able to respect and accept their differences then love has a chance to blossom. -- John Gray (author, Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus)

To a certain extent a man loses himself through connecting with his partner. -- John Gray (author, Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus)

Men are much more willing to say yes if they have the freedom to say no. -- John Gray (author, Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus)

Sports

I have only one superstition. I touch all the bases when I hit a home run. -- Baseball player Babe Ruth (1895 - 1948)

Half this game is 90% mental. -- Yogi Berra

War & Peace

The most disadvantageous peace is better than the most just war. -- Desiderius Erasmus

There is nothing so likely to produce peace as to be well prepared to meet the enemy. -- US President George Washington

For a war to be just three conditions are necessary - public authority, just cause, right motive. -- St. Thomas Aquinas

A prisoner of war is a man who tries to kill you and fails, and then asks you not to kill him. -- Winston Churchill

My first wish is to see this plague of mankind, war, banished from the earth. -- US President George Washington

All warfare is based on deception. -- Sun Tzu (The Art Of War)

The only way to abolish war is to make peace heroic. -- John Dewey

The first casualty of war is truth. -- Rudyard Kipling

No one can have peace longer than his neighbor pleases. -- Dutch proverb

Peace, like charity, begins at home. -- US President Franklin D. Roosevelt

"Peace" is meaningless; what we want is a glorious peace. -- Napoleon I

Propaganda

The propagandist's purpose is to make one set of people forget that certain other sets of people are human. -- Aldous Huxley (The Olive Tree, 1937)

All propaganda must be so popular and on such an intellectual level, that even the most stupid of those toward whom it is directed will understand it... Through clever and constant application of propaganda, people can be made to see paradise as hell, and also the other way around, to consider the most wretched sort of life as paradise. -- Adolf Hitler

The great masses of people will more easily fall victims to a big lie than to a small one. Especially if it is repeated over and over. -- Adolph Hitler

The real struggle is not between East and West, or capitalism and communism, but between education and propaganda. -- Martin Buber (d. 1965)

Nationalism/Patriotism

Guard against the impostures of pretended patriotism. -- US President George Washington (Farewell Address 1796)

Patriotism is the principle that will justify the training of wholesale murderers. -- Leo Tolstoy

In the beginning of a change, the patriot is a scarce man, and brave, and hated and scorned. When his cause succeeds, the timid join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot. -- Mark Twain (American Writer)

History/Politics

HISTORY

History is fables agreed upon. -- Voltaire

History is just new people making old mistakes... -- Sigmund Freud

Who controls the past controls the future. Who controls the present controls the past. -- George Orwell

POLITICS

Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you. -- Pericles, 430 BC

Economics
The forces in a capitalist society, if left unchecked, tend to make the rich richer and the poor poorer. -- Jawaharlal Nehru

Money

Love of money is the root of all evil. -- New Testament (1 Timothy 6:17)

Lack of money is the root of all evil. -- George Bernard Shaw

Do not value money for any more nor any less than its worth; it is a good servant but bad master. -- Alexandre Dumas

Young people nowadays imagine that money is everything; when they get older they know it. -- Oscar Wilde (1891)

Power

Power concedes nothing without a demand. It never has, and it never will. -- Frederick Douglass (1817-1895)

Anarchy is the stepping stone to absolute power. -- Napoleon I (Maxims, 1815)

Power corrupts, but lack of power corrupts absolutely. -- Adlai Stevenson (New York Times, February 19, 1987)

Slavery/Freedom

Knowledge makes a man unfit to be a slave. -- Frederick Douglass

Necessity is the plea of every infringement of human freedom. It is the argument of tyrants; it is the creed of slaves. -- William Pitt

Prayer

[We want] a constitutional amendment to permit voluntary school prayer. God should never have been expelled from America's classrooms in the first place. -- Ronald Reagan (January 25, 1983).

When thou prayest, enter into thy closet and when thou has shut the door, pray to thy Father which is in secret, and thy Father which seest in secret shall reward thee openly. -- Jesus (Sermon on the Mount, Matthew 6:6)

Love

The supreme happiness in life is the conviction that we are loved. -- Victor Hugo (Les Miserables 1862)

The first symptom of love in a young man is timidity; in a girl boldness. -- Victor Hugo (Les Miserables 1862)

Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired. -- Robert Frost (Poet)

True love always makes a man better, no matter what woman inspires it. -- Alexandre Dumas (1852)

Science

Science and religion, religion and science, put it as I may, they are two sides of the same glass, through which we see darkly until these two, focusing together, reveal the truth. -- Pearl S. Buck

The scientist is not a person who gives the right answers, he's the one who asks the right questions. -- Claude Levi-Strauss (Le Cru et el cuit, 1964).

The whole of science is nothing more than a refinement of everyday thinking. -- Albert Einstein

Science without religion is lame, religion with science is blind. -- Albert Einstein

Science is what you know; philosophy is what you don't know. -- Bertrand Russell (1958).

There are in fact two things, science and opinion; the former begets knowledge, the latter ignorance. -- Hippocrates (400 B.C.)

Science is always simple and always profound. It is only the half truths that is dangerous. --George Bernard Shaw