Jokes

Please remember that these are JUST jokes, they are NOT intended to offend anyone. However, if you are the kind of person that gets offended easily, or prefer cleaner jokes, click here to go to our squeaky clean jokes section.

FYI: These jokes are mostly contributed by our readers.

Nasty/Gross Jokes (View Discretion Advised, do not read if easily offended.)

• One day a man and a woman...
• The devil and the three men in hell
• A guy walks into a bar...

One day a man and a woman were having rough and crazy sex, the man was so into it, that suddenly, the condom flew off his dick and out the window landing on the street. The couple ran to the window, and noticed a boy had picked up the condom.

The man yelled "Hey kid, if you give me that back, I will give you a dollar. The boy was not really bright, and so he did not know what a condom was. He asked, "What is this?", the man yelled back, "It is a twinkee". So the boy returned the condom.

When the boy went to school, he told his friends about how a guy gave him a dollar to return a twinkee. His friends said "So what is the big deal about that". The boy cunningly replied, "I returned the twinkee, but after I sucked the cream out of the middle."

The devil and the three men in hell
One day the devil told three men, a black guy, a white guy and an asian guy that he will let them go to heaven if they pass his test.

The devil said "whoever places his dick on my hand, and if it does not melt he can go to heaven". Naturally, wanting to go to heaven really bad, all men agreed. First, the white guy placed his dick on the devil's hand, and it melted. Then the asian guy nervously placed his dick on the devil's hand, and it also melted. The black guy with a big smile on his face, placed his dick on the devil's hand, and to everyone's surprise, it did NOT melt.

The devil was surprised, and said "How could this be?". The black guy responded, "Chocolate melts in your mouth, not in your hands!"

A guy walks into a bar...

A guy walks into a bar and orders a double whiskey. The bartender brings him the drink, he drinks it and says, "Give me another." "Hey pal, says the bartender, "What are we celebrating?"

"My first blow job", says the customer.

"Great", says the bartender, "I think that calls for one on the house!".

"I don't care where they come from," says the man, "I just want to get this taste out of my mouth."